Katy Perry Back Banging Bloom

August 17, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

With Katy claiming to kiss girls and like it, no one knows why her heterosexual relationships keep failing.


Orlando Bloom Fucked a Waitress Out of a Job

May 23, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Since somebody mentioned Orlando Bloom might be gay a decade ago, he’s made it his mission to fuck the living shit out of the world’s good looking 20-something women. A dramatic response, but there is a ton of fucking involved, so it beats angry Tweeting.


Malin Akerman And Orlando Bloom Threesome In ‘Easy’

September 27, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Orlando Bloom seems to lead a blessed life. He made one movie series anybody cares to remember. That got him to fuck Miranda Kerr in her prime. They split up and now he’s pounding muffins with Katy Perry. Not an altogether inconsequential catch no matter what you think or her music or even look. She’s a trade-up from a Victoria’s Secret model. No simple task.


Orlando Bloom Bare Cock Paddling Katy Perry

August 5, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

If you love famous man dick, the Internet has a present for you. Orlando Bloom took his bare cock and Katy Perry out on a paddle board in Sardinia, because that’s what you do when you do whatever the fuck you want. Bloom seems super gay, but it turns out he’s just British and it’s hard to tell the difference.


Orlando Bloom Doesn’t Like Fatties And Shit Around The Web

February 12, 2015 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

Moderately fey elf Orlando Bloom all but admitted that when he’s out slaying pussy, he is not a fan of the plus sized ladies. He prefers skinny chicks because they’re more agile and closely resembling young boys. I’m not saying that he’s in the closet…but I’m not not saying that. Read all about Orlando’s fatty hate. (TMZ) […]


Orlando Bloom Justin Bieber Bar Fight Was Super Intense (VIDEO)

July 30, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

No matter where you fall on the pussy scale of life, it’s super important at any given moment in your life to not be the biggest pussy in the room. The second biggest pussy skates. The biggest pussy is singled out by the pack and devoured. Look around the room. If you’re not sure if […]


Is Selena Gomez Porking Legolas?

April 29, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Selena Gomez has been seen around town with the very pretty Orlando Bloom. The two were spotted canoodling outside of the Chelsea Handler live comedy show at the L.A. Forum where half of Hollywood were ordered to attend by their shared publicists. When the photogs spotted the new couple, Bloom darted away like he was […]


Orlando Bloom Has a New Girlfriend

February 1, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Miranda Kerr tossed Orlando Bloom because she tired of mounting a dude who giggled every time he found the perfect new turtleneck. So Orlando went somewhere where skinny dudes can wear kerchiefs and ride mopeds and still have hot girlfriends — France. I remember seeing this Nora Arnezeder chick in the movie Safe House when […]


Orlando Bloom is weird

February 10, 2012 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr are in Australia today, and she’s in a bikini drinking champagne in a hot tub with some other random girls who are also in bikinis, and he’s holding a naked babies penis up to his face. He must really really like that babies penis.