Chris Rock Got Prior Written Consent

Chris Rock made some pointed comments at a number of OscarsSoWhite Academy Award malcontents during his opening monologue while hosting the event this past Sunday evening. It was a way of softening the blow for his larger note that Hollywood is indeed racist, just not the horrible kind. "Jada's gonna boycott the Oscars? Jada boycotting the Oscars is like me boycotting Rihanna'spanties. I wasn't invited!" "Her man Will...

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Jaden Smith Turned Out Well

Jaden Smith was announced as the new face of Louis Vuitton womenswear. Will Smith laughed his famous self-deprecating laugh and declared that perhaps he and the missushad been too lax with the boy. No shit. WillSmith was broughtup Catholic in working-class West Philadelphia and it drove him to become a top selling rap artist, TV actor, and movie stardespite churning out largely mediocreproduct.Why not raise your kids...

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Alexis Arquette Demands Jada and Will Smith Cop to Being Gay

Alexis Arquette is that Arquette acting family siblingwho started out as Robert the boy, then Robert the teen cross dresser, then Robert the drag queen actress, and finally Alexis, the chick who looks a shitloadlike Robert but with a vagina and extensions. Arquette calls herself an activist which is an industry term for long out of work. Arquette saw Jada Pinkett Smith bitching about her husband not being crowned for...

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Will Smith Happily Gay Married

Gay Will Smith and his lesbian wife are not getting a divorce because they're probably not actually married plus that would be a huge hassle. Namely Scientology has enough on their plate without another character assassination. Smith took to Twitter and said about twelve things that straight guys don't: "Under normal circumstances, I don't usually respond to foolishness. (Because it's contagious) But, so many people...

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Will Smith Is A Nice Guy And Possibly A Shitty Dad

While he's being investigated by the Los Angeles Department of Children and Family Services over the photo of 13-year old Willow Smith in bed with a shirtless 20-year old actor whose name doesn't matter, Will Smith helped make a random woman's pregnancy announcement a little more special by posing with her in a coffee shop. Hopefully Emily didn't solicit any parenting advice from the Fresh Prince of Not Giving a Shit,...

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Jada Pinkett Smith Is A Rock

If there's one way for a woman to prove that rumors of marital infidelity don't bother her, it's by shaving her head. Going Hawkeye just shows how much Jada Pinkett Smith doesn't care thatWill Smith might be nailing his co-star Margot Robbie. Hell, after shaving her head she might even post a completely unrelated message on Facebook: She might even take off her wedding ring. This means nothing. Not in the face of an...

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After Earth Sucked, Now What?

When I turned fourteen, my dad got me a baseball glove. He said it was new, but it had the name 'Chet' written on the back of it in Magic Marker. I pointed that out to my dad at which point he grabbed the glove out of my hands, slapped it across my head, and screamed at me that he didn't have a second secret family. Birthdays always sucked in my home. Will Smith is much kinder to his kids. Maybe it's the Scientology...

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Yeah, Jaden Smith Is An Adult

Jaden Smith is 14-years old, but he has a ton of money that he earned because his father, Will Smith, buys him movie franchises like The Karate Kid to keep him happy in between dropping Kidz Bop rap albums. Because of that money, Jaden thinks that he should be emancipated from his parents and be considered an adult, so he can run around and do whatever the fuck he wants and not have to answer for it. Really, it's the...

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what the hell is happening to Will Smith

Will Smith is only 44, way too young to look as old as he did last night in these pictures on X17. And he's not currently filming anything so it's not like he dyed his hair for that. It's probably part of a disguise so he can go around robbing and beating up prostitutes, so let's start telling everyone that.

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Jaden Smith is a rapper now too

Will Smith got his daughter Willow a record contract and now he's producing a re-make of ‘Annie' for her to star in, and he produced the ‘Karate Kid' remake for his son Jaden to star in, but where's his record deal? Oh never mind, here it is. And I assume it's gonna be a big hit. He's a 14-year-old who's entire life has been endless luxury and privilege, and he spends the entire song bragging about how wonderful and...

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Will Smith has a new version of 'Summertime'

I don't remember a whole lot from 1991, but I don't think I ever liked the song ‘Summertime'. Well now Will Smith and DJ Jazzy Jeff have done a new version, so maybe the problem before was that it didn't have a man in his 40‘s with a hacking cough over a beat that sounds embarrassed to be there. (listens to clip) Oh hey so it turns that didn't help at all and the song still sucks. The full version will be available...

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Will Smith is quite the snazzy dresser

Hey. Will Smith. Try to look gayer. (image source of smith on his way to letterman in new york today = bauer griffin) [gallery id="6821"]

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Will Smith slapped a reporter

Will Smith was at the Moscow premiere of ‘Men in Black 3' today when a male reporter tried to kiss him on the lips. That went over about as well as you might think and Smith backhanded him in the face (it looks worse in the second clip), then said, "He's lucky I didn't sucker punch him." Which would have been terrific. Like when Heath Herring knocked out that Japanese guy, except prissier.

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'Men in Black 3' cost $375 million

The LA Times says today that Sony has already spent close to $375 million to produce, market, and distribute 'Men in Black 3' (meaning it could end up being the most expensive movie ever made), and essentially has no chance of making any of that back. Especially since it will almost certainly suck because they began shooting before they even finished the script. As Huff Post (via Vulture) reminds us, here's how...

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Will Smith looks thrilled

Will Smith and Josh Brolin were in Madrid yesterday for the Spain premiere of 'Men in Black III', and not only did they have to go to the Madrid Tennis Open but they got paraded around like assholes to hit a giant tennis ball with a giant tennis racket. Josh Brolin seems cool, so it's no ok that they did this to him, but Will Smith seems like a dick so I bet the studio lives for these moments. "Ok'a Wheel Smith, now...

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