Ali Lohan Moves; Lindsay Helps

August 9, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Ali Lohan was moving some of her shit in New York to a new apartment, and everybody was wondering what happened to her boobs. At least, I was. They done gone disappeared. Maybe in one of the bags. It... READ MORE

Kelly Brook’s Man Cheats On Her, There’s a Lesson Here Somewhere

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Professional male athletes are as stupid and horny as the rest of guys, they just have an easier time finding the girls to be stupid and horny with. Danny Cipriani plays rugby, which I’m told is a real sport... READ MORE

Kim Kardashian Sticks Out Her Tongue and Says ‘Ah… I’m Still Fucking Here’

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kim Kardashian isn’t going to show herself until she loses some of the twenty stones she put on in baby weight carrying her first bastard baby ever to full term. So, like March, 2017. But staying out of the... READ MORE

Rambo Talks Shit About John McClane

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Sylvester Stallone is talking mad action hero shit about his former Expendables castmate Bruce Willis. A couple of days ago it came out that Willis wouldn’t appear in Expendables 3 and he would be replaced by the walking corpse... READ MORE

Mark Wahlberg Wants Everybody To Lay Off Of That ‘Little Bastard’ Justin Bieber

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Mark Wahlberg recently sat down with the Sun to talk about his new film, 2 Guns, and he was asked his opinion on the recent troubles of pop star and bucket-pisser Justin Bieber, who is also currently being accused... READ MORE

Naomi Campbell In A Bikini

August 8, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Naomi Campbell isn’t bad looking when she’s not currently beating you with her Blackberry. She does like to whack people with her cell phones. I think she’s done it about a half-dozen times, though mostly just to her submissive... READ MORE

Rosie Huntington-Whitely Is Really Good At Going To The Gym

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Supermodel and actress Rosie Huntington-Whiteley took a break from being incredibly attractive and dating Jason Statham yesterday so she could go to the gym and still look incredibly attractive. In fact, she looks like she barely even broke a... READ MORE

Time for Me to Adopt Usher’s Kids

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Usher almost lost his kid a couple days ago drowning in the home pool as his arm got stuck in the drain. You know, like how you lost half your buddies as a kid. Fucking pool drains. Usher’s ex-wife... READ MORE

Nicki Minaj Is Still So Edgy (And Topless)

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Nickin Minaj posts a lot of self-shots to her Instagram account, as she likes to show off her various modeling faces, including “confused,” “bothered,” “a little sleepy” and “pissing in an alley.” But yesterday, she stepped her game up... READ MORE

Zooey Deschanel Runs Around On The Beach Filming

August 8, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Everybody loves Zooey Deschanel because they see her as the attainable girl. Cute, quirky, not hot or snobby. The kind of girl you could actually get. Only, you haven’t gotten her. Neither have I. Nor anyone you know. So... READ MORE