Chris Brown Wants to Understand Why People Get Upset When He Hits Them

You may remember that last time Chris Brown went to anger management counseling, he learned that he can't be leaving visible marks on his bitches when he gets to feeling like a boiling teapot. But that was court appointed counseling. In the manner of the new celebrity... read more

Kanye Believes He and Kim Are More Important Than the Obamas

Kanye West is having another bout of saying shit that makes sense in his world. This time he's claiming that the Blessed He and Kim are more influential than President Obama and his wife Michelle. It all went down when the megalomaniacal semi-decent rapper sat down with... read more

Playboy Playmate Colleen Shannon Arrested For Smuggling Canadian Douchebag

Colleen Shannon was blessed with some killer looks and got herself some major league tits, but a Playboy Playmate and self-described 'world's hottest DJ' does not a scholar make. So when she went to rendezvous in upstate New York with her Canadian drug convict boyfriend... read more

Kardashians Rent Out Magic Mountain Just For Themselves (VIDEO)

Last week the reality family took over AT&T Park to formalize the procreation process between Kim and Kanye, now Magic Mountain theme park just north of Los Angeles to celebrate Kendall's 18th birthday. The place can run about 25,000 visitors on a good day. On a... read more

Dina Lohan Is Managing Ali Lohan's Music Career

Mostly underwhelming 19-year old model Ali Lohan has apparently decided that she wants to focus more on her music career now – "Ali wants her new sound to be Miley Cyrus meets Lana Del Rey" – and according to Radar, she's wisely being managed by the most competent and... read more

Corey Feldman Wants To Take Down Hollywood's Pedophiles (VIDEO)

Corey Feldman is talking to just about any media outlet that will have him right now so he can promote his new book, "Coreyography," which details, among other things, his claims that he was molested by some of the biggest names and wealthiest people still working in... read more

Paula Abdul Had Her Bat Mitzvah In Israel

Paula Abdul could barely contain her batshit excitement when she met Israel's President Shimon Peres yesterday during her visit to his country, as she was there to celebrate her Bat Mitzvah just a few decades after most other Jewish girls. The former pop star and... read more

Camille Grammer's Got Cougaring Problems

When those drunk and miserable Beverly Hills Housewives get canned by their husbands, they inevitably go and grab some young exotic looking dude to peacock around. Camille Grammer found Dimitri Charalambopoulos. And, no, I'm not fucking writing his last name ever again.... read more

Hugh And Crystal Hefner Are Pretty Fucking Creepy

Somebody pulled the old man from his sarcophagus and dressed him up like Robin Thicke so that his young bride would finally look like she had a purpose for being bent over in a tight dress. The two of them together looked like a wax exhibit at the Boner Kill Museum. More... read more

Keyara Double Fisting

This Keyara chick may be the first girl to survive the 138 Water Satanic cult. She must have some kind of special powers designed to ward off celebrity stalkers. Like a rape whistle. Or not being a celebrity. Or maybe it's reverse polarity of her power sized tits that... read more

Kim Kardashian Thinks About Her Snatch More Than You Do

Kim Kardashian is different than most moms in that her main concern after giving birth was what her pussy looked like. This revelation and many more is on the premiere episode of her show for the catatonic and mildly retarded,Keeping Up With The Kardashians. After... read more

Kelly Osbourne Tells Lady Gaga to 'Eat My Shit', Gaga Considers

At some point years ago Kelly Osbourne had the bright idea to call Lady Gaga a butterface. Yes, we all see the irony. Lady Gaga's carrot-brained junior scouts swore vengeance on Ozzy's booze and food addled daughter and called her a fat cow and talked about burying her... read more