TLC Is Giving Kate Gosselin More Money

TLC announced yesterday that at some point in June, it will air a one-time special featuring Kate Gosselin and her eight children to answer the biggest question on every asshole's mind: "Why haven't those poor children been taken away from their desperately... read more

Melissa Ceja And Bella DoubleD In Bikinis For A Photo Shoot In South Beach

Photo Credit: Splash [gallery guid=804052] read more

Dr. Drew Joked That Belle Knox's Dad Should Kill Himself (VIDEO)

The Duke porn star who was outed by one of her douchebag friends was a guest on HLN's Dr. Drew On Call yesterday, during which the host and a panel of perfect so-called experts did their best to talk louder than her to prove that they're right and she's wrong. Belle Knox... read more

Deimante Guobyte in A Bikini

I'm getting really fucking close to learning this girls name. I'm perhaps one solid wardrobe malfunction away from assigning the frontal lobe power required to pronounce a foreign name. It's too late for the current generation, but it would be nice if we started limiting... read more

Scarlett Johansson Is Savvy

Scarlett Johansson is pretty smart. She managed to carefully navigate a response to being called out in Dylan Farrow's 'I Got Fondled And Nobody Gives a Shit' letter as one of the actors who should be ashamed to be working with Woody Allen. Scarlett called upon a... read more

Kate Moss In A Bikini On A Yacht In St Barts

It's been a long day. I just want to kick back and check out a coked out just okay looking supermodel drinking wine on a yacht in St. Bart's. Kate Moss is perfect for that. I think she's got a husband now and maybe a kid. She never brings them on her fun trips. Family is... read more

People Still Miffed Over Jenny McCarthy Killing Millions of Kids

Some people just can't let shit go. So Jenny McCarthy turned the killer kids disease clock back a couple hundred years with her campaign over the last several years to scare the shit out of people from vaccinating their brood. Based on her extensive 'some college', she... read more

Lady Gaga Got Puked On and Demi Lovato Doesn't Like the Aftertaste

I come to this tale with a little jealousy. I've been wanting to vomit on Lady Gaga's face long before this fancy pants performance artist came and spit up colored milk all over her damaged koala looking frontside. I once saw a performance artist shove a potato up her... read more

Courtney Love's Clairvoyant Powers Prove Rusty

The true tragedy of that missing Malaysian jet liner has yet to unfold. As far as collateral damage, I can tell you that my plans to never ever visit Malaysia have been extended by ten more years. It's not you, Malaysia, it's me. The good news is that whether the plane... read more

Jennifer Nicole Lee Likes to Flash Her Waxed Bits

This Jennifer Nicole Lee fitness instructor slash I guess she's a model likes to do that peekaboo trick with her bikini bottom where she almost shows you her waxed cooch. This could be seen as sexy, or the most commonly exploited trap by tranny prostitutes to allure you... read more

Farrah Abraham Is Blowin' (VIDEO)

Farrah Abraham has just released an autotuned monstrosity called Blowin. Yes, it's really called Blowin but she means "Blowin all the bullies away" and not in a "I'm blowin' James Deen until I can no longer taste my own ass" kind of way. The song has her screeching about... read more

Ashanti in A Bikini

In life, people will only measure you on your improvement in situation. People love to say shit like 'Hey, you lost weight' or 'I heard you got a big promotion!' Nobody ever says 'That's great that you used to be not such a fat fuck' or 'Boy, you did well for yourself in... read more