Angelina Jolie Wears Her Kids Proudly

September 2, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A woman who decapitates her boobs because of possible future cancer isn’t the kind of woman that waits around for shit. After just twelve years of making, extricating, and PayPal-ing for babies with Brad Pitt, Angelina Jolie decided to get hitched. They were running that line for a while about how they couldn’t get married […]

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No One Cares That Brangelina Got Married And Shit Around The Web

August 28, 2014 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie got married in secret and no one gave a flying fuck. It’s not like it’s 2002 when you were on the cover of magazines and Angelina had yet to cut off her breasts. What’s the fucking point of getting married after having 85 kids together. It is too late. Read […]

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Brad Pitt Was ‘Attacked’ At The Maleficent Premiere (VIDEO)

May 29, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Serial red carpet asshole Vitalii Sediuk has tried to “prank” some of Hollywood’s biggest stars in the past, having shoved his face in Bradley Cooper‘s and Leonardo DiCaprio‘s crotches at movie premieres to the delight of no one, and Will Smith even slapped him in the face for trying to kiss him. Last night, at […]

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Brad Pitt Throws Like a Girl

May 21, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Nobody gets everything in life. You got the A-list movie career, the hot wife who is only half crazy with self-mutilation and third world adoptions, and the adoration of millions of fans. Men want to be you, women want to be with you. You’ve succeeded simply by being super fucking charming. The world is your […]

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12 Years a Slave Has Ended Racism

March 7, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

All the buzz at the vegan juice bars this week is about how 12 Years a Slave won Best Picture at the Oscars, despite at least two Academy voters admitting they didn’t even watch the film. They voted for it because it just felt right. Nothing shocking really, since most people applauding this film have […]

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Angelina Jolie Celebrates The Anniversary of Removing Her Boobs

February 18, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It was a year ago that Angelina started to ensure she couldn’t ever get breast cancer by the logical step of getting rid of her breasts. The move was somewhat controversial given that there was no way to know if she’d even ever get breast cancer in the future, just a strong possibility. But Angelina was […]

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Angelina Buys Brad Pitt A Fucking Island

November 27, 2013 | Uncategorized | editor| 0 Comments

What do you buy the man that already has everything? A fucking heart-shaped island, of course! At least that’s what the once hot Angelina Jolie got for Brad Pitt for his 50th birthday. Petra island is a small rock 50 miles off the coast of New York City that has two houses built by the […]

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Jennifer Aniston And Angelina Jolie Almost Flew On A Plane Together

August 14, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

It has been eight years since Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt divorced so he could go about not feeling guilty over having crazy monkey sex with Angelina Jolie every day for the rest of his life, and while the star of We’re the Millers is now engaged to that other guy who isn’t nearly as […]

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Brad Pitt Can’t See Faces Anymore, Now What?

June 4, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Here’s a little tip for the ladies. If a man informs you that he has an unusual illness that in any way shape or form might lead him to sleep with another woman, he’s going to use that illness as a crutch to cheat on you. Consider that a lock. Take Brad Pitt for instance. […]

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For $50,000, You Can Own This Photo Of Angelina Jolie

April 18, 2013 | Uncategorized | editor| 0 Comments

Next month, a series of original photographs of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, taken by world-famous photographer David LaChapelle, will be up for grabs at Christie’s auction house in London. Among those photos is the shot above, which features a then-25-year old topless Angelina Jolie frolicking with a horse. The image was excluded from a […]

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