Chris Brown Dumb Down His Lambo

Chris Brown hired some guy to paint a bunch of illegible Sanskrit looking letters on his Lamborghini. The text is supposedlythe lyrics to a Tupac songthough they could also read, Chris Brown is a pussy tool who takes numerous men up his ass. That's the danger in hiring a... read more

Chris Brown Seems Stupid High

Chris Brown tweeted his half assed opinion that Ebola is apparently a government engineered form of population control. There was some liberty involved in that summary because it took longer to hash out than Brown's own opinion: "I don't know ... But I think this Ebola... read more

Kendall Jenner Is Cruising for a Bruising

According to a typically spotty US Weekly report, Kendall Jenner is infatuated with Chris Brown. Jenner reportedly took a liking to him after he was released from jail for beating Rihanna. In the world of US Weekly articles written at the 8th grade level, that makes him... read more

Chris Brown Seems Earnest

Chris Brown is a known gang affiliate who probably irritates victims of gang violence yet remains conspicuously popular among the Nobody You Know demo. For whatever reason Brown has received a pass to permeate mainstream media even though he only performs at crime scenes... read more

Chris Brown Leads To Bad Things

Some totally innocent guy got stabbed at an after party where Chris Brown was performing. Cops suspect Brown's crew of known Bloods gang members may be to blame because stabbing is listed on their Match.com profiles as their interests right after reading the Sunday paper... read more

Chris Brown Still A Dick And Shit Around The Web

Chris Brown and his entourage started a bottle throwing fight at a club because they lacked any more original ideas. Chis Brown's like a wild dog that's been flogged to fight and just has to be put down before anyone else gets bitten. Like in Old Yeller only no one will... read more

Suge Knight Takes All The Bullets, Chris Brown Gets None

According to Chris Brown's posse and a number of really stupid hot models, a trained killeropened fire at Brown during his pre-VMA party at the 1OAK Nightclub in L.A.. Brown employed his extraordinary dancing skills to narrowly avoid the bullets which subsequently hit... read more

Chris Brown Surely Loves Charity Sports Events

Last month it was a Chris Brown celebrity kickball game with all the felonious minions and Kardashians he could gather up. Now, flag football against Puff Daddy's son. Chris Brown is either building his curriculum vitae for a middle school P.E. teacher vacancy or he's... read more

Chris Brown's Neighbor Seems Cool

Chris Brown's neighbor threatened to shoot him if he sets foot on his property. It is unclear why the guy has a problem with Brown though equally unclear why anyone would not have a problem with Brown. Chris has been throwing loud parties and some of the depraved whore... read more

Chris Brown's Celebrity Felon Kick Ball Raises Eleven Dollars (VIDEO)

Only mostly everybody at Chris Brown's Kick'N' It for Charity Celebrity Kickball game in Glendale had rap sheets. Chris, DJ Khaled, The Game, and a few other charitable fellows famous for drugs and beating women showed up for a cause nobody could actually name. Paris... read more

Chris Brown Violates Parole via Instagram

Chris Brown posted a photo to Instagram again confirming his gang affiliation with the Bloods. Even though Brown is happy to be allowed shoelaces again, the point of this photo was in the caption which read: "It's bool! I stand on my own two feet when life gets brazy!"... read more

Chris Brown and Karrueche Tran Split Over Ass Pic

In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. That's Karrueche Tran quoting Buddha on social media. Most girls who date Chris Brown take the ancient communal meditations strong... read more