the Olsen Twins are selling a $55,000 backpack

By brendon December 03, 2012 @ 4:31 PM

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Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen are selling 12 backpacks, made of crocodile skin and encrusted with prescription pills (fun fact: Mary Kate was dating Heath Ledger when he overdosed on prescription pills in 2008), as part of their clothing and accessory label named The Row, and they’re selling them for $55,000. Each. Which is at least ten times what I would pay for the actual Olsen Twins. For 55 grand, one of the pills better be a roofie with a map to Marissa Millers bedroom on it.

lindsay was dating heath ledger when he died

By brendon November 10, 2009 @ 2:15 PM

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Heath Ledger has been dead for almost two years now (1.22.08) and until today no one had any idea that he was dating Lindsay Lohan when he died. Probably not even him, because the latest audio tape from Michael Lohan is the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. Radar says…

Dina Lohan drops the bombshell that her daughter Lindsay was secretly dating Heath Ledger when he died and his death devastated her.
“She was dating Heath when he died,” Dina reveals to Michael. “I don’t know if you know that, but I know cause I would drop her off and they were friends very, very close, ok?”
Dina told Michael about the relationship because she was afraid for Lindsay’s life too: “Because when she’s drunk or takes an Adderall with it she will do something like Heath Ledger did in a second without thinking.”
She said that the actor’s death was a terrible shock to Lindsay. “That f****d her up,” Dina says.

This story does make a lot of sense, especially if you know anything about Lindsay Lohan. She has a quiet dignity about her.  Secrets and discretion are her specialty. It must run in the family. Notice how casually Dina talks about Lindsay – who had been 21 for just a few months – being drunk all the time and taking pills she almost certainly didn’t have a prescription for. Dina is too regal to judge others. No, if Lindsay wants something like that, she should find some type of guardian or protector, a “parent” type if you will.

Heath Ledgers final role

By brendon August 11, 2009 @ 2:33 PM

Heath Ledger had finished about half of his scenes for “The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus” when he died on January 22nd of last year, but thankfully his final work was salvaged by having Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell play Ledgers character in various incarnations. Luckily this is a Terry Gilliam movie so I’m sure shit like that will seem perfectly reasonable as it happens. This is the brand new trailer and it looks okay, but if it doesn’t have teen vampires moping around and getting into love triangles, how good could it really be? What a piece of shit! Why did they even bother?!

matilda will get the oscar

By brendon February 18, 2009 @ 7:15 AM

The Academy Awards are this Sunday, and there are only two guarantees.    1.  At around 8pm, I’ll say, "aww shit, is that boring crap tonight?  God dammit."  2. Heath Ledger will win Best Supporting Actor for The Dark Knight.  Up until now, no one knew who would actually keep the statue.  Which is where I’m headed with this.  

Academy tradition calls for a posthumous statuette to go to the spouse, or, if there is no living spouse, to the oldest child. Ledger wasn't married, and Matilda is his only child.
Yet because she is only 3, Matilda is legally unable to sign the winner's agreement – a contract required of all nominees that says the recipient will not resell his or her Oscar without first offering it back to the academy for $1.
After conversations with Williams and with Ledger's family in Australia, the academy hit on a solution: "In the event that Heath Ledger should be selected as the supporting actor recipient, the statuette will be held in trust for his daughter by her mother, Michelle Williams, until Matilda reaches the age of 18," says Bruce Davis, executive director of the academy.

One other guarantee is that I'll be a sensitive mess when Ledger wins.  That dude was awesome, and it sucks that he’s gone.  Also, my rare display of emotion will win me points with the ladies.  Girls like guys who shed a single tear during stuff like this and also animal cop shows.  They don’t, however, like it when you cry uncontrollably on their voicemail because they never returned your calls after your date.  In my defense, you did say you would call.  I thought we really hit it off.

one year ago today

By brendon January 22, 2009 @ 3:57 AM

It was one year ago today that Heath Ledger was found dead in his Manhattan apartment.  He was 28, and had just finished work as the Joker in "The Dark Knight".  

I'll never forget where I was when I heard.  I had just gotten Megan Fox into reverse cowgirl and she was begging for me to finish in her mouth when the news broke.  And just like that, what started as a seemingly ordinary day became one I’ll remember for the rest of my life.  This world sure is crazy sometimes.

THE LIFE INSURANCE IS STALLING

By brendon September 29, 2008 @ 11:21 AM

The LA Times and TMZ say that ReliaStar Life Insurance Co. has yet to pay on the 10 million dollar life insurance policy taken out by Heath Ledger.  The New York City medical examiner ruled his death an accident, but now ReliaStar has launched an independent investigation to determine if he in fact took his own life.  

(RelaiStar) is being sued over failure to promptly pay that claim … the lawsuit says that ReliaStar is acting in bad faith by launching its own investigation into the actor's death.
The suit was filed by a trustee for Matilda, 2, Ledger's daughter with actress Michelle Williams. The money would go into a trust set up for Matilda.
ReliaStar's lawyers are going to try to take depositions from Mary-Kate Olsen, as well as that mysterious masseuse who made the calls to her from Ledger's apartment, costars on his last film, his agents, doctors, psychiatrists etc.

At least they were nice enough to put on a big charade before not paying.  Most insurance companies would put a finger under their nose as if it were a mustache and then then say No Speaka English, or just throw a cat at you and then run the other way when you show up for you check that they agreed to give you.