Kanye’s Insurance Payout Is Nuts

November 25, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kanye West sure seems nuts. Like Kim Kardashian sure seemed robbed. In eerily similar actuarial circumstances, West stands to earn a massive insurance payout for unpaid expenses and future lost revenue on the entire remainder of his Pablo Tour scheduled to run six more weeks.


The Kanye Thing Starting To Make Sense

November 23, 2016 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Contrary to popular belief, you can be mentally ill and a huge asshole. Meaning, you don’t get to walk around acting like a major cunt and blame it on your illness. Some schizophrenics think the clouds are cartoons. Others stab strangers in the subway station. Those ones are part of the asshole group.


Kanye Says Something Nice About Trump, Hospitalized

November 22, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A black dude calling out Hillary Clinton and Beyonce in the same breath is plenty enough precursor to a forced hospitalization. A pro-Trump quote is a mandatory 5150.


Kanye West Burns Through Furniture

November 8, 2016 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Kanye West is clearly a gay guy, based on how he has many gay tendencies and zero straight tendencies. This likely also explains why he’s so angry despite the fortunate circumstances.


Jury’s Still Out On Kim Kardashian Robbery

October 4, 2016 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Most people’s first reaction upon hearing Kim Kardashian was bound and gagged and robbed in Paris was this is obvious bullshit. Also, history please don’t judge us incorrectly, we weren’t all into fat chicks.


Kim Kardashian Held Up At Gunpoint, Kanye Drops the Mic (VIDEO)

October 3, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kim Kardashian was held up at gunpoint in her French hotel room. Two men posing as police busted into her suite waving guns and presumably asking for money and jewels. Big score. Way too ruin Fashion Week, fuckers.


Life of Pablo Merchandise Coming to Your Town

August 18, 2016 | Uncategorized | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kanye’s Life of Pablo pop up shops are one of those social tests that define you as a person. Do you have ten hours to wait and four hundred bucks to spend on a Life of Pablo hoodie? Could you make the most of that time perhaps by also hoisting signs about free college and how the patriarchy is keeping you out of the good jobs?


The Chick Who Fucked OJ Is Not Quality

August 9, 2016 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Apparently Kanye West and Kylie Jenner were up for a shoe contract so the mom blasted some shit out to the press. It’s not easy to turn an Olympian gay.


Nobody Understands The Legality of Swift/West/Kardashian Phone Recording (VIDEO)

July 20, 2016 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

A plethora of armchair lawyers and dumb bloggers are speculating as to the legality of someone recording Kanye West’s phone call to Taylor Swift. To recap, she’s a liar and if you look at her face it seems plausible she drinks kitten blood.


Taylor Swift Stone Cold Busted (VIDEO)

July 18, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Taylor Swift has vociferously maintained that she had no advanced knowledge that Kanye would malign and objectify her sexually her in his idiotic song, Famous. Swift insists she was shocked and pissed on behalf of herself and all woman-kind when she heard these misogynistic lyrics in Famous: