Twitter Is the Premier Choice of Your Jihadi Types

Congratulations to Twitter. While the social media site has been losing market share in inane tween girls who could really benefit from fresh air and burpees, they've been cleaning up in Islamic State supporters. About 46,000 of them reported on Twitter in the past three months, which still pales in comparison to the human carnage resulting from the millions who follow Dr. Oz. There's a healthy crossover between...read more

Twitter Exec Can't Figure Out Twitter

Twitter CFO Anthony Noto tried to send a direct message to someone on Twitter but accidentally posted it publicly. This comes as a relief to anyone who has tried using Twitter, foundered incompetently, and ended up posting defamatory remarks about The Kids These Days on Facebook or just the bulletin board at work. While it wasn't of the "I like it when you wear that fireman outfit and play with my balls" variety of...read more

US Airways Took Social Media To New Heights

One of the fun things about being a person who doesn't spend every waking moment on Twitter is that if someone important tweets something incredibly fucking stupid, which is usually at least once a day, and they delete it almost immediately, there's still a chance that someone caught it and copied it. Yesterday, someone at US Airways proved this in a whole new way, when the airline tweeted an incredibly raunchy photo...read more

Hackers Outed Justin Bieber On E!'s Twitter

The Syrian Electronic Army became a household name two weeks ago, when so-called hackers logged into the Associated Press' Twitter account and Tweeted that there had been an explosion at the White House and President Obama had been injured. The result was a 100-point dip in the DOW Jones Industrial Average in a matter of seconds, as people everywhere freaked out and prayed that Gerard Butler was coming to the rescue....read more

lets all pretend X-Men 3 never happened

Brett Ratner is such a shitty director that when he was done with ‘X-Men: The Last Stand', the franchise had to literally go back in time before it existed and start over. Which is how we got 'X-Men: First Class' from the terrific Matthew Vaughn. Now the sequel to that is back with Bryan Singer (who directed the first two), and he was twitter this afternoon to announce that Ian McKellen and Patrick Stewart will be...read more

Chris Brown fans seem stable

Chris Brown was doing the same stupid shit he always does on twitter last night (post "sexy" pictures of himself like it was some kind of gay classified), when he found himself in a war or words with beloved twitterer Jenny Johnson. As you can see, things did not go well for Brown, on account of him being a dimwitted retard. Brown: "I look old as fuck! I'm only 23..." Johnson: "I know! Being a worthless piece of shit...read more

Chris Brown's Girlfriend Doesn't Make Sense

Chris Brown's girlfriend, Karrueche Tran, made the news recently by engaging in a Twitter fight with Rihanna in which they both actually fight over urban America's most beloved moonwalking woman-beater. In a new turn of events, and what I'm attributing solely to some sort of brain damage (See: being Chris Brown's girlfriend, Results of), TMZ reports that Karrueche claims she is afraid of Rihanna's crazy fans after...read more

50 Cent had a rough night

50 Cent was on his twitter page all last night, after a frightening encounter with some inner city hooligan. "I can't believe my grand mothers making me take Out the garbage I'm rich fuck this I'm going home I don't need this shit." "Got dam it motherfuckers I'm having a bad dayThere's other people at the house she just likes to boss me around." It's like a scene from Big Momas House. Luckily for her, 50 calmed down...read more

i think you still need lyrics

Katy Perry and her producer went back on forth on twitter last night, with him begging her to get some work done and her explaining that she already had plans for the evening. What a coincidence. Downloading porn is a big part of my writing process too. She's still gonna need lyrics though. You cant record an entire album about how much you love big black cocks. Well you can, but that might send mixed messages to your...read more

Britney worships the devil

Her handlers are claiming Britneys twitter page was hacked this morning after the wallpaper changed and two posts revealing her allegiance to the devil were posted, but of course they're gonna say that. Nice try. It's fairly obvious that she worships Satan. Or, hey look, if you have a better theory as to how an average looking white girl who can't sing or dance made a billion dollars with her sexy singing and dancing,...read more