Zac Efron and The Rock Have Cheat Days

March 10, 2016 | Uncategorized | josh-j| 0 Comments

New America’s icons of masculinity, Zac Efron and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, have “cheat days.” They claim that these are days when they cheat on their strict diets, which they’re on for the upcoming Baywatch movie no one was clamoring for. Efron also gets one day to cheat on his his homosexuality. A day to binge […]

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Zac Efron is Fire Proof

February 9, 2016 | Uncategorized | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Somebody up there likes Zac Efron. Most prominently the studio executive standing above him shaking the last bit of cum out on Efron’s mug. Efron’s been cast in yet another medium budget “bro culture” comedy, Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates. “Bro culture” is a term promoted by breathless Cosmo bloggers and studio marketing departments to pretend that […]

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Zac Efron Shit on MLK

January 20, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

The Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King Jr. had his faults. He liked to fornicate. But he got a ton done for black civil rights. Every January government workers and bank tellers get to watch basketball at sports bars to celebrate his birthday. You don’t fuck with MLK Day publicly. It’s the one nicety America gave to black […]

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Michelle Rodriguez Fucks the Gay Out of Zac Efron

August 4, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

At this point, Michelle Rodriguez is merely toying with the true depth of her sex powers. She’s like Zod with a vagina. She can fuck the gay into people. Now she’s trying to fuck the gay out of Zac Efron. That’s like earning a perfect ten in gymnastics before Nadia Comaneci. It seems inconceivable. But […]

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Zac Efron Took His Shirt Off For Morons (VIDEO)

April 14, 2014 | video | editor| 0 Comments

There’s really no better way to confirm that your career is still on track and definitely not being dragged down by rumors of an intense cocaine addiction than by showing up at the MTV Movie Awards and letting someone tear your shirt off. Zac Efron did just that after he was honored with the most […]

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Zac Efron Couldn’t Act His Way Out of a Paper Bag Filled with Airplane Glue

April 1, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

According to the journalists at TMZ, Zac Efron’s friends are afraid to confront him about his really big problem. No, not the fact that he’s been shitty in over fifteen straight shitty failed movies. He’ll still get fifteen more, that’s how Hollywood works. And, no, not his pretending to be straight. That’s a given for […]

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Sure Zac Efron, You Were Looking For ‘Sushi’

March 28, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

You know how when someone is really fucked up on drugs and has a serious problem that absolutely needs to be addressed, they just lie their asses off to get everyone to leave them alone, and then they go about their business, just doing all the drugs they can get their hands on? That might […]

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Zac Efron Got Punched By A Homeless Man

March 27, 2014 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Zac Efron might be battling his inner demons by trying to beat the shit out of homeless people. At least that’s the theory that I’m working on this morning, as we all try to figure out why the fuck a once-squeaky-clean guy like Zac Efron was hanging out in the Skid Row area of Los […]

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Did Zac Efron OD Before Going To Rehab?

September 27, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Zac Efron is having a very public struggle with addiction but did it get so bad that he overdosed ? Word on the Internets is that it did. Back in January, before he went into rehab, Zac reportedly had to be resuscitated at a party after he took a bunch of Oxycodone and Aderall. I usually […]

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Zac Efron Might Have Had A Big Cocaine Problem

September 18, 2013 | celebrity | editor| 0 Comments

Further proving that most celebrities are the victims of their own narcissistic desires to be mentioned by the tabloids and gossip sites on a daily basis, actor Zac Efron allegedly not only went to rehab recently for substance abuse, but he also finished his treatment five months ago without anybody ever mentioning it. According to […]

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