Eva Longoria got revenge

By brendon November 18, 2010 @ 1:47 PM


When Eva Longoria found out her husband Tony Parker was “sexting” with Erin Barry, the wife of Parkers San Antonio Spurs teammate Brent Barry, she knew her marriage was over, but that’s not what she told Parker. Because she wanted to exact some sort of revenge first. Why would she do that instead of just walking away? Because Latin girls are all completely fucking crazy, that’s why. Radar says…

“But Eva was hurt and she wanted a little revenge,” the source revealed. “So she blindsided Tony with the divorce filing.
“They were working out the details about who was going to file and when. They didn’t want it to become a messy divorce. Then Eva got a little revenge and didn’t tell Tony she was filing and dropped the papers on him, catching him off balance for the media blitz.”

Wow that was lame. She really sucks at revenge. Nice. Now I love her more than ever. Obviously she’s fantastic looking, but she’s so damn little, she’s basically a fleshlight that makes 3 million dollars a year. Top that.

Ke$ha was just as sexy in high school

By brendon November 18, 2010 @ 11:42 AM


Some people wonder why Ke$ha wears so much glitter and paint and all these distractions. Those people clearly haven’t seen her yearbook photo from Brentwood High School (go Bruins!), about 20 minutes south of Nashville. Maybe it’s because the picture is a grainy black and white, but she looks like Nosferatu. I’m scared to even turn around right now. I feel like, because I opened this picture, she might be behind me.

(to be honest this is sort of surprising because she looked way better when her family hosted paris hilton and nicole richie on ‘the simple life’. video under the cut)

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Dina Lohan told Fox this is “defamation of character”

By brendon November 17, 2010 @ 10:05 PM


Way back in December of 2006, Lindsay Lohan sent out a drug fueled text telling other celebrities that they should sue the tabloids for defamation of character, even though she doesn’t know what that means.

“Let’s sue the tabloids for saying the things they say. Defamation of character. Amongst other illegal accusations, I will repeat this over and over to make my point. I am not fully aware of what these, again, accusations are, but I am fully and eagerly prepared to learn them”.

Clearly she never bothered to learn those terms, because back in March she tried (unsuccessfully) to sue E-Trade for 100 million dollars, and today (Tyler Exclusive, btw!) Dina Lohan sent a letter to Fox about last nights episode of Glee, calling it – oh you’ll never guess – “defamation of character.”

So is another lawsuit on the way? Probably, yes, because the Lohans are dumb as rocks with no source of income. It’s almost like they’re a family of possums.

Natalie Portman is a good actress

By brendon November 17, 2010 @ 5:21 PM


This red band trailer for Your Highness looks shockingly bad and unfunny, and apparently they knew it too because they included footage of Natalie Portman taking her clothes off. And at that point the trailer looks wonderful. I would do so much damage to this girls ass, they could only repair it with the tears of a phoenix.

Glee made fun of Lindsay Lohan and Dina doesnt like it

By brendon November 17, 2010 @ 4:47 PM

Last night on Glee, Gwyneth Paltrow played a substitute Spanish teacher who tries to relate to the students by working Lindsay Lohan references into her lesson plan. Specifically about what a screw-up she is, by asking things like, “how many times has Lindsay been to rehab?”

Needless to say Lindsay’s mom is livid over this outrageous slander.

Lindsay Lohan’s mom and siblings think “Glee” was shameful for mocking Lindsay on the show last night … this according to sources connected to Dina and the kids.
 We’re told Dina is saying, “Shame on them,” and the family feels it was “tasteless.”

To recap, Dina raised this punk ass Lindsay, who has been in jail 4 times (mugshots!) and rehab 5 times by the age of 24, and yet she’s the one acting outraged. Holy Christ, people make fun of Michael Lohan, but, simply the fact that he didn’t punch Dina in the face 5 times a day makes me think he’s some kind of saint.

Afternoon headlines

By brendon November 17, 2010 @ 3:15 PM


EVA LONGORIA – has finally put an end to 30 hours of rumors and filed for divorce from Tony Parker, essentially ending their 3 year marriage. Who know pro athletes liked to sleep around? Not me! (e!)

COWBOYS AND ALIENS – has a badass teaser trailer out today, starring James Bond and Indiana Jones. By the end you think maybe the aliens should have started with Cody Banks and Rick O’Connell and gotten a little practice first. (yahoo)

CARLY FOULKES – is the tmobile mytouch 4g girl, and I mention that because this is what we do now. We stalk hot girls from commercials liberate deserving young actresses from the shackles of anonymity!

Renee Zellweger knows how to pick workout clothes

By brendon November 17, 2010 @ 1:08 PM


This is why everyone hates women. Renee Zellweger wears a pair of tights to the gym that looks like something you’d wear to be an anatomy class model, oh, but if I get caught looking at her toaster, suddenly I’M the pervert here right? What does she have on under that jacket, blinking Christmas light wrapped around her tits?

(source = fame)

Tony Parker has been cheating on Eva Longoria

By brendon November 17, 2010 @ 11:55 AM


Despite denials yesterday, at least in regards to whether or not Tony Parker filed for divorce, Us magazine goes on sale today with a cover story claiming that Parker has been cheating on Eva Longoria for over a year. Well, not really cheating, but close enough to piss off his wife.

Eva Longoria Parker and Tony Parker have split after three years of marriage, Us Weekly reveals.
Multiple sources tell Us Weekly that Longoria Parker, 35, recently discovered that her husband, 28, has been exchanging personal texts with a mutual female friend for nearly a year — hundreds in just one month.
She plans to file for divorce soon.
“Eva is heartbroken by the betrayal,” says one insider, adding that her husband confessed to the inappropriateness – which took place for nearly a year – after she confronted him.

Basketball players should know better than to date Latin girls, because those dudes WILL cheat, and Latin girls WILL catch them and then freak the fuck out. He should just be glad he didn’t get stabbed with a pencil or something. Eva might be interested to know that I’m single and I can’t stand basketball, but best of all, I’m a sweet gentle boy with a heart full of love.