When Little Nicky was on ‘American Idol’ last year, many were wondering what he was gonna do in the studio because on stage he was at his best when singing over the top insanity and screaming like a woman. The answer was to have Alain Johannes and Natasha Shneider, who played with Queens of the Stone Age on ‘Songs for the Deaf’, write some over the top insanity where he could scream like a woman, then give it to that stupid ‘2012′ movie.
In the video, the world seems to be falling apart, and I was very frightened, but Adams calm and level headed walking really put me at ease.
Last night Paula Abdul channeled all her seething contempt for Ellen DeGeneres and opened the 2009 VH1 Divas concert by doing an impression of her. Meaning she dressed like a man and danced like she was smuggling something packed inside her anus. A better impression of Ellen would have been to have sex with Portia de Rossi, but only if we all went back to 1990 first. Point being, about an hour ago on twitter, Ellen condescendingly patted Paula on the head and told her to run along now.
Paula- you’re hilarious. You’ve left me some big shoes to fill…unfortunately I don’t wear high heels. Nothing but love for you too.
Yes it must be intimidating to have to follow Paula Abdul. So much preparation must be involved, like knowing which way to point your chair during the show, and the ability to recognize your name when called upon.
Ellen DeGeneres is a mean-spirited ungrateful bitch who many, many people in Hollywood genuinely despise (more on that here). She also has no practical experience in the music industry. Combine these two things and it only makes sense that she’s been named the fourth judge on ‘American Idol’. I’m lying of course. What. The fuck.
“DeGeneres will sit alongside Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson and Kara DioGuardi and offer her own unique perspective to the contestants throughout the competition,” Fox television says in a statement.
DeGeneres, 51, begins her stint after the audition rounds, which have featured a rotating group of celebrity guest judges including Shania Twain, Victoria Beckham, Mary J. Blige, Joe Jonas and Kristin Chenoweth.
All 5 of the people on that list would have been a better choice, and I don’t even know who 2 of them are. There is literally no one on earth that would have been this bad. If someone stood next to you and acted the way she does, with her annoying dancing and embarrassingly stupid jokes, you’d call the fucking cops.
Victoria Beckham of course filled in for Paual Abdul when auditions began last week in Denver for season 9 of “American Idol”, but according to producers it was to be a one time thing. And yet now E! is reporting that Victoria is on her way to Boston for the second round of judging as well. Could this mean she’s already been named as the full time fourth judge? What about Katy Perry and Jessica Simpson, who were also considered? Will they be on the show at all now? How the hell would I know. Leave me alone!
Posh Spice just joined staffers from the hit Fox reality competition aboard an American Airlines flight bound for Boston, site of this week’s round of American Idol auditions.
Natalie Eshaya, a producer for Idol host Ryan Seacrest’s syndicated KIIS-FM radio show, offered a play-by-play via Twitter.
“Hmmm victoria beckham on our flight to boston….hmmm!” Eshaya tweeted. “We are going for idol….she must be too! Interesting!!”
Last week show producers said they wanted to stick to the four-judge format, with guest judges like Beckham and Katy Perry serving as one-time-only fill-ins.
I love Victoria so this would be fine with me. I love her hot little outfits, her uppity little façade, and the fact that beneath that she seems genuinely nice and self-effacing. More to the point it would mean Paula would be officially gone, and all these rumors of her returning for the finals would go away. I’d rather see ten-story meat eating dinosaurs come back before Paula Abdul.
VICTORIA BECKHAM - was in Denver today to fill in for Paula Abdul on the first day of American Idol auditions. New rumors claim Paula may still return if they pay her 10M. To recap: Paula quit late Tuesday night, and by Friday morning the producers had replaced her with someone far smarter, hotter, younger and free. Ahh, well played Paula. I think someone has been reading “The Prince”. (source = the ap)
WILL SMITH AND JADA PINKETT - deny that they are scientologists and say the private school they founded will not teach scientology, but Jada fired the head of the school last week after she complained about the curriculum, and now her replacement is an active scientologist. Conspiracy, or is that just what the aliens want us to think? (source = radar)
HEATHER GRAHAM - is in Barcelona today with her boyfriend, who I heard is gay and/or cheating and/or kills prostitutes. Whichever one might drive her to me faster, that’s the one I heard. (hq jump = here)
Oh holy crap finally. Finally, finally, Paula Abduls dumb ass is off “American Idol”, saying on her twitter page 11 hours ago:
With sadness in my heart, I’ve decided not to return to Idol. I’ll miss nurturing all the new talent, but most of all I’ll miss being a part of a show that I helped from day 1 become an international phenomenon.
There is so much wrong with the second half of that statement I don’t even know where to begin. At best she was useless. More often she was a drunken menace, and usually it wasn’t even clear if she was talking to the right person because her “advice” rarely had any relevance to anything that had happened on stage. Listening to her is like reading a transcript from some other language done by someone who only barely speaks English. And they had to do it in a hurry. And someone had just whacked them in the head.
