Seth Rogen and James Franco introduce todays red band trailer (meaning it has salty language) for ‘This Is The End’, written and directed by Rogen and his partner (professional, not sexual) Evan Goldberg, by mentioning that the world is supposed to end today according to the Mayan calendar, but I’m not sure if that’s true because this is the first I’ve heard of it. Why hasn’t this been in the news!?! If only there was some way to disseminate insane conspiracy theories, some way to link people from all over, world wide, as if in a web.
Movie award shows don’t have to be boring and awful and tragically unfunny, Billy Crystal just makes it seem that way. Take the Independent Spirt Awards for example, which were held in Santa Monica on Saturday and hosted by Seth Rogen.
The video above has Crystals entire monologue from the Oscars last night and then a few examples from Rogen. As you can see, a Billy Crystal joke follows a simple two-step formula:
1. Say some random thing that he’s heard of.
2. Smirk like an asshole.
Rogen on the other hand did things like compare Brett Ratner and the Oscars to Chris Brown and the Grammys:
“Seriously, you say a few hateful things and they don’t let you within a hundred yards of the Oscars. You could literally beat the shit out of a nominee and they’ll ask you to perform TWICE at the Grammys.”
And brought up the murderous Jewish mobsters in ‘Drive’:
“That movie made Jews look so scary I thought Mel Gibson directed it.”
Come to think of it, whoever keeps letting Billy Crystal sing those Oscar medleys filled with idiotic puns might have some secret anti-Semitic agenda too. The hate those things inspire is almost irrational, it’s like some kind of fever.
CONAN O’BRIEN – brought in 4.2 million viewers last night for the premiere of his TBS show, easily defeating Leno (3.5 million) and Letterman (3.4 million). And he showed how they plan to keep using old characters like the Masturbating Bear while getting around NBC’s intellectual property right claims. When it comes to apex predators wacking off, accept no substitutes. (deadline)
SETH ROGEN – says he was so nervous to propose to his girlfriend, he just ran in the house and did it. It was not good timing. “She was in our closet, changing, and she was literally only in her underpants. I had already kind of started. I didn’t picture it like this, and I know she didn’t picture it like this.” Wow so she was topless? What a whore! (people)
KRISTEN STEWART – will be “practically naked, a lot” in the next Twilight movie, though I didn’t catch the name of it. To be honest I thought we were done with these. How long is this gonna go on? (e!)