By Lex November 18, 2013 @ 3:28 PM
Drake and his late night strip club date, Rihanna, and his posse of twelve dudes who follow him around to falsely compliment him, spent upwards of 100 grand of cash at a Houston strip mall strip club. One of the strippers claims the couple was ‘nice’ and Rihanna even gave her inspiration to pursue who singing career while slapping her ass. I guess I can’t judge Rihanna for being like every other dude I’ve ever gone to a strip club with. For his part, Drake’s hired friends decided it would be a good idea to film each other at the strip club throwing huge amounts of cash around. Then film the girls backstage counting all their cash, you know, just to give some low hanging fruit to the local IRS office. It’d be easy to lament the gratuitous amounts of cash wasted by a pair of young knucklehead singers, but I’d rather look at the glass half full and call it one fortunate evening to have chosen whoring over dental hygienist school.
Photo Credit: Splash
By Travis October 11, 2013 @ 10:00 AM
While Lamar Odom’s crack smoke hasn’t even dissipated yet, Kris Jenner is rumored to be hard at work in finding a new boyfriend for Khloe Kardashian, who isn’t divorced, but who the fuck cares when there’s cash and ratings to be earned? According to In Touch, Kris has been trying to set Khloe up with rapper Drake because she thinks the daughter she probably had with someone who isn’t Robert Kardashian finally deserves someone who isn’t a jerk. Meanwhile, Kris herself will probably soon be looking for a new boyfriend now that she and Bruce Jenner have split, and I’ve got my fingers crossed for Chris Brown’s dad or a bunch of starving sharks.
(Photo Credit: Kris Jenner’s Instagram)
By Travis August 21, 2013 @ 11:00 AM
Rapper Drake posted a video to his Instagram yesterday morning after he was pulled over by a female cop for not having a front plate or something, and he spent about 10 seconds talking about how cute the officer was while mentioning that it was “too early.” Then I assume he spent the next 5-10 minutes apologizing profusely for his error and swearing that he’ll rectify the situation as soon as possible, before the cop issued a warning and sent him on his way.
Or maybe she Tazed the shit out of him for an hour and invited children over to kick him in the face. Because that would be pretty cool, too.
By Jack July 22, 2013 @ 5:08 PM
A judge threw out a lawsuit aimed at feuding hip hop assmunches Drake and Chris Brown. A company called Entertainment Enterprises (that’s vague and porny enough) sued the dimwits for 16 million dollars after they got into a massive brawl and tore up… a completely different club. Entertainment Enterprises owns a club called Greenhouse which is next door to W.i.P. Lounge where the fight actually took place. Entertainment Enterprises claims that their place got a bad rap because of the rapper fight next door and people stopped coming. The judge told them to STFU and to stop filing stupid lawsuits. Which even though it’s right means that Drake and Chris Brown face little to no consequences for their bottle tossing entourage girly fight. Other than being thought of as total dicks by most of the world. But I can tell you firsthand that’s not much of a punishment.
By Jack June 18, 2013 @ 11:29 AM
Drake and Chris Brown continue to have their bitchy little prick waving contest over Rihanna and Drake is afraid it’s going to end “badly”. I don’t know if he means gunned down in the street badly or that time Audrina and Lauren fought over Ricky Bobby on The Hills sissy girl badly. I’d go with the latter. Drake was asked about his beef with America’s favorite lady beater in GQ and here is what the suburban childhood actor turned P.R. machine bad-ass had to say:
“I wish we could sit down, just like you and me are right now, and talk it out man-to-man…But that’s not going to happen. I’m not confrontational, but if someone challenges, I’m not going to back down…If I think about it too much, I feel it wrapping around my foot, like I get a feeling it could end really badly.”
I’m not sure what the “wrapping around my foot” stuff is all about,. Does he mean like a pair of socks you’re trying to get on while your feet are still a bit wet from the shower and they just won’t pull over your damn heels. Cause I really hate that. I will tug that fucking sock until it starts to stretch out of shape. That shit will end badly. I get it now. Chris Brown is the sock and Drake is the wet foot. This is old school gangster.
By Travis March 22, 2013 @ 10:00 AM
You know what? Good for Amanda Bynes. If you’re going to spiral out of control and go from being America’s sweetheart and a girl next door to looking like an unemployed porn star who shoplifts from Hot Topic, you might as well just lay it all out there. And if that means using Twitter to beg rappers for hardcore sex, then you go ahead and use those 140 characters or less to ask Drake to “murder your vagina”.
At least Amanda isn’t out there running babies over and flying around the country on the dime of an energy drink company that nobody’s ever heard of because she’s late for her 654th court appearance of the year. Hell, she could Tweet photos of a homeless man slapping her bare tits like a pair of bongos and she’d still be 10 times the human being that Lindsay Lohan is. If Lindsay is a copy of Swank, then Amanda is at least a Penthouse.
So go get that vagina murdered, Amanda. We’re pulling for you.