According to people who listen to really shitty pop music, that above video of Selena Gomez and girls that she makes out with in my brain is what some people call a “diss track”. The intended target of Selena’s... READ MORE

There are two types of dudes in this world. The kind who can’t stop thinking about the men their girl was with before them. And the kind who are able to let it go. The second group is split... READ MORE

Justin Bieber ran around London yesterday grabbing his dick and wearing a gas mask. I’m told the cops over there don’t carry guns. Excellent. I’m also told Bieber is a huge Argentina fan. To be clear, Scotland Yard, my... READ MORE

As long as ‘Spring Breakers’ keeps Selena Gomez and Vanessa Hudgens in bikinis, the movie could be about them pointing at my penis and laughing and I’d still be fine with it. I’d still see it 5 times. Hell... READ MORE

In case it wasn’t clear before, Justin Bieber is a little faggot. Not in the sense that he has sex with other men (presumably), I don’t think anyone uses “faggot” in reference to gay guys anymore, but because he’s... READ MORE

If you’re the photographer who took these pictures of Selena Gomez in a bikini by a pool in Miami today, it’s ok that you didn’t zoom in when she spread her legs, but just so you know, if it... READ MORE

That headline picture is basically what Justin Bieber sees when he and Selena Gomez are alone, and tries to stifle his homosexuality long enough to get an erection. (image source of selena at the tornoto film festival this weekend... READ MORE

Justin Bieber has a reputation as a sweet and lovable kid, but real fans like me know he’s actually a tightly coiled merchant of death. In fact one time he punched a guy so hard the guy flew all... READ MORE

Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber were at the Lakers-Spurs game in LA on Tuesday night, and this morning on Ryan Seacrests radio show (audio here) she was asked about being shown on the Staples Center “kiss-cam”. I’m assuming it... READ MORE

Selena Gomez was on the set of ‘Spring Breakers’ today, playing a character is named Faith. Vanessa Hudgens’ character is named Candy. That probably helps explain why Vanessa had money stuffed into her bikini and Selena didn’t. Because girls... READ MORE