Gnarly. Shaun White A Douchebag, But Not For Sexual Assault

February 14, 2018 | News | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Anyone watching the Olympics last night knows first and foremost that North Korean figure skaters are only allowed to pick outfits inspired by Tron, and secondly that snowboarder Shaun White is probably the biggest douchebag in the world. He’s a late-to-the-game Gen X-er who is moved to tears by his own success and says things […]

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Marlon Brando’s Son In Denial And Disbelief Over Gay Daddy

February 14, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

The world of celebrity was a different beast back when Marlon Brando and Richard Pryor were big names. Ultimate decadence has always been defined as diddling another dude’s dick just because you can. The only difference is that you kept quiet about it in the 70s. It was called being polite. When you have women […]

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Victoria Justice Busty Goddess and Crap Around the Web

February 13, 2018 | crap around the web | Robert Paulsen| 0 Comments

Rita Ora NSFW vacay, Elizabeth Hurley cleavage, and more!

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Chicago News Station Thinks Winter Olympics At P.F. Chang’s

February 13, 2018 | WTF | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

As a Chicagoan I disagree with media coverage that portrays us as Mad Max, but I absolutely agree with any coverage that portrays us as people who think about food 24/7. This Saturday our local ABC station accidentally identified the most popular chain restaurant for poor people celebrating, P.F. Chang’s, as the location for the […]

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Tyra Banks Makes Danielle Herrington’s S.I. Cover About Her

February 13, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Danielle Herrington is the third black model ever to cover Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition, which is a damn shame considering Chrissy Teigen graced the cover in 2014. Wasn’t there anyone else in the world? I mean Oprah would have at least garnered onlookers worried about the giant beached whale. Who’s giving them… a car? Anyway the folks […]

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Kim Cattrall Tells SJP She Can Keep Fake Condolences

February 13, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Kim Cattrall’s brother, Chris Cattrall, had been missing since January 30th. Kim asked for followers on social media for help with finding him but her brother lived in Lacombe. I doubt she has many fans following her in geographical locations where wild moose roam. She recently received the unfortunate news that Chris had been found […]

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Victoria Beckham Blocking Spice Girl Blessings

February 13, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Victoria Beckham is the best example of the “B word” at the moment and depending on who you’re asking it’ll be different words both beginning with “b” used to describe the same woman. If you’re asking anyone related to her they would say her decision to ruin the Spice Girls reunion is very bold or […]

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Kylie Jenner Hides Stomach Casserole In First Post-Baby Pic

February 13, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Purchased bot followers everywhere are rejoicing now that their queen Kylie Jenner is finally back on Instagram after she took a hiatus to focus on the antichrist stewing in her ovaries. But it’s probably going to be a while until Kylie the pornstar is back in action now that her not-even-able-to-legally-drink twenty-year-old body has been ripped […]

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Mr. Skin Podcast Ep 84: Omarosa Manigault Breast Slip on Celebrity Big Brother

February 13, 2018 | celebrity | Robert Paulsen| 0 Comments

It’s rare to see a nip slip on a reality show, but it’s even rarer for a whole breast to pop out!

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Kim Kardashian Reveals 24-Inch Waist Size At Book Club

February 13, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

Fake news. Fake news fake news fake news. Kim Kardashian can’t read. After an afternoon of grazing in a field of penises and laxatives, the most majestic centaur around saddled up to her supposed “inaugural book club meeting” to spill the deets about her amazingly trim waist. In equine lingo so would be about 16 […]

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