METALLICA – has offered $50,000 as a reward to help find a girl who went missing after one of their concerts in Virginia.  Have they checked the hospitals?  Maybe she checked into one to see if they could help... READ MORE

SHAUNA SAND – Put down your coffee and brace yourself, because here comes shocking news: Shauna Sand has decided to stop fighting the release of her sex tape, claiming a lawsuit could be “long and expensive”. Yeah, I got... READ MORE

The Tuesday morning headlines are brought to you by this guy. Either one really. MADONNA – is cheap. She made 110 million dollars last year, yet only gave $459,000 to charity. This may sound thoughtless, but keep in mind:... READ MORE

WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE – ruled the weekend box office by earning 32.5M. Notice I said “earned”. You could learn a thing or two about hard work and the value of a dollar from this movie, young man.... READ MORE

KIM KARDASHIAN – will get paid 50 grand to have a birthday party (she turns 29 on Wednesday) at Tao inside the Venetian in Las Vegas. I sometimes stand outside of Tao and loudly complain on my cell phone... READ MORE

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN – Over 2000 people, people with no connection to each other, from different parts of the world, all claim to have seen this man in their dreams. I would have posted this sooner, but... READ MORE

DAVID LETTERMAN – made a second on-air apology to his wife, because she pretty much threatened to cut his nuts off if he didn’t. “He wanted the whole thing to blow over. But Regina told him he better make... READ MORE

DAVID HASSELHOFF – spent two days in a London hospital this week after a drinking binge that lasted for days. You really have to wonder why someone would do this. Considering there’s so much legal weed only an hour... READ MORE

MICHAEL VICK – will have a reality show on BET to chronicle his life since being released from prison. It will be “serious and somber” and “revisit the Virginia property where he ran and financed a dogfighting ring.” This... READ MORE

LINDSAY LOHAN – wrote a poem to go along with this ransom photo professional modeling picture to promote her clothing line that finally brings together the worlds of Fred Flintstone and Catwoman.  It includes the words “glamour”, “elegance”, “sophistication”... READ MORE