oh no she di'ent!

I have no rational explanation for why I don’t hate Ryan Seacrest, but I don’t. There I said it. I know I should, but I don’t. I think hosting live TV is really really really hard. That’s why no one does it. But he does it as well as you can, especially considering the... read more

BRAD SAYS HE NEVER CHEATED

Brad Pitt tells W magazine this month that he never cheated on Jennifer Aniston with Angelina Jolie while they (Pitt and Jolie) were filming "Mr. and Mrs. Smith". Although he should have. Jeez this bitch is ugly. Pitt says..."What people don't understand is that we filmed... read more

JUST LIKE THAT BABY

I think if Angelina Jolie bent over in front of you like this, I think you should be allowed to start humping her. Wait, no, not you. Me. After all, this website brings joy to the hearts of millions, and isn’t that what Angelina wants, for people to be happy?(picture... read more

ANGELINA IS PREGNANT. AGAIN. MAYBE.

In Touch Weekly, which gets some credibility here because they broke the news of her being pregnant with twins, now says Angelina Jolie is pregnant again, for the third time, with bf Brad Pitt. If true, it would be her seventh child. The Daily Mail says...In an... read more

STFU JENNIFER ANISTON

When asked about then-husband Brad Pitt leaving her for Angelina Jolie, Jennifer Aniston told Vogue magazine, "what Angelina did was very uncool". In other words, she continues to talk about the past and blames Angelina. It's much more likely Brad Pitt woke up one day and... read more

BETRAYAL!

Star magazine hits the newsstands today with the headline, Angelina's Humiliating Betrayal, followed by an exclamation point, indicating excitement, so you know this is gonna be good. Angie is livid over Brad's recent freewheeling behavior with the happily single costars... read more

ANGELINA MIGHT WANT TO GET MARRIED

Angelina Jolie has been married twice already and has said she’d never get married again, but now it seems she’s at least open to the idea. At first I read this and got all excited but it turns out she meant with someone else. People magazine says...Asked if she plans to... read more

GTFO

Someone very much in a position to know this kind of thing just texted me and said Angelina and Brad have broken up. I call “no way”. They seem happy. But then again I thought Megan Fox and I were happy until she had security remove me from the tree outside her bedroom.... read more

MADDOX HAS A NEW HAIR CUT

Maddox Jolie showed off his new blue mohawk today in Venice. Brad and Angelina seem like fun parents. I was never allowed to get cool haircuts like this and now I go to therapy twice a week. Massage therapy. I wasn’t getting enough handjobs from Vietnamese sex slaves... read more

THE TWINS ARE HERE!!!

People magazine and Hello magazine were the first to reveal Knox Léon and Vivienne Marcheline Jolie-Pitt to the world last night. People hits the newsstands today and features an unprecedented 19-page spread with the new wondertwins. They say:In an exclusive interview and... read more

THEY HAD IN VITRO?

US Weekly is breaking the news right now that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie turned to in vitro fertilization to conceive their newly born twins, Knox and Vivienne. IVF is typically used when a couple has trouble conceiving, but in this case Us says Brad and Angiejust... read more

AS EXPECTED

As they did with the first pictures of their baby Shiloh, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt will donate every dime that they collect from selling the first pictures of thier new twins to charity. The Daily Mail says that offers are already on the table for up to 10 million... read more